Hula Girls and Hoochie Mamas

I made a terrific discovery today … drum roll please!! … I can fit into some pants that I have NEVER worn from about 5 years ago! That doesn’t sound very impressive but, believe me, it is! These are pants that I bought in a “skinny” moment of weakness; in fact, I have NO idea what I was thinking! One pair is a flowery kind of tropical island meets Spain capris and the other is a shell dangling (no kidding), beaded cuff, tropical palm frond decorated hula pair. Both are way more “out there” than I normally am … at least where clothing is concerned. I tried them on for a lark this morning as I was going through potential “cruise” wear and, lo and behold, they actually fit!! Fit!! On my used to be fat ass! And without the “this is really too small for you” pulling at the crotch and everything. They legitimately fit. I modeled them in front of Prince Charming and he gave them the cruise-worthy okay so in my suitcase they go! I think that they will be perfect for a 4-day cruise to Cozumel especially with the crowd that we are going with (tending to favor loud Hawaiian shirts and drinks with umbrellas).


As you may have guessed Prince Charming and I are going on a cruise. It will be our first one and we are looking forward to checking it out. We like active vacations so this will either fit the bill or we will be the first on the gang-plank when we get back. Either way, a 4 day cruise is a good way to get our cruising feet wet. People that I have talked to either love them or hate them so we shall see. We are cruising to Cozumel (1 day in port) and otherwise will be at sea. I will definitely make sure that I have plenty of Dramamine on hand for sea sickness (another reason that we haven’t done a cruise before).

We chose “Amazing Race Cozumel” as our in-port activity. It is the only activity (and there were a lot to choose from) that I thought that Prince Charming and I would enjoy. In fact, we are both looking forward to it. Here is the description from the website:

Play Amazing Cozumel Race - an interactive, clue-based adventure game that's like a reality show! Equal parts live-action mystery novel, and scavenger hunt, it's the best and most fun way to experience Cozumel.
On this excursion you will:
Form teams of two or more, with a maximum of 10 guests per team.
Be met at the pier and taken to the starting line.
Spend an exciting day racing throughout Cozumel, solving devious clues each step of the way.
Try to be the first to unlock a secret code and defeat an ancient Mayan Curse.
Enjoy a brief snorkeling adventure.
Use your wits, energy, and sense of adventure as you race against time and your shipmates.
See a side of Cozumel most visitors never get to see.

So, it is off cruising we go tomorrow. I am not sure about on-board Internet access but I will post if I can.

Have a fantastic day!!

Ella

Project 365 Photo of the Day

Pumpkin has accused me of falling down on my duties both as a blogger and as a Project 365 participant. She says that I am like a Project Whenever you like participant which might not exactly be the same thing. I plead the flu and its lingering influence. In the spirit of participation I took this picture after returning from a Laser Hair Removal treatment (just be happy that I passed on the Pube appointment today). Enjoy :)

Holy Exercise Orgasm Bat Man!

A friend (Thank you Space Monkey!) sent me a scary but interesting article the other day. It was a follow-up to a discussion that we had about endorphins and exercise. She mentioned that she felt wonderful after exercising because of all of the endorphins. I told her that I would probably exercise more if I actually got that who endorphin rush but mostly I just get tired. I wonder if that is the big difference between people who LOVE to exercise and those of us that have a bit of a struggle with it. I really do wish that I could get all jazzed and happy after exercising! I would love to feel that endorphin rush that people talk about. I wonder why it happens for some people and not for all of us. I will try to research this a bit more.

Well, I don’t know if this will help you, and it kind of freaks me out a little, but apparently you can get an orgasm from doing crunches. Yes, the dreaded crunch might not be so dreaded anymore! Apparently (I did NOT try this at home!) on Glamour.com Someone called Smitten writes that This ab workout brings her to orgasm every time.



Here's her secret:
You just lie on your back, bend your knees and put your feet on the floor, like you're doing regular sit-ups. Then press your lower back into the floor, and tilt up your pelvis slightly. Cross your arms over your chest and just do low sit-ups, moving just a little bit up and down.
She claims that if you do them the right way, the pressure it puts on your body gives you a big O … every time!

So would you exercise more or less if you knew that “the Big O” was there for you every time? Can you call that an increase in endorphins? Enquiring minds want to know!! Well, maybe we don’t want to know …

Is “She” / “He” Really A Pregnant “Man”?

I just had a conversation with Pumpkin about whether the “Pregnant Man” is really a man or not. I say that she / he is not a technically a man and Pumpkin contends that he / she is. There is a television show on right now that sparked the debate.

According to the television show the fact that Tracy / Thomas had her / his breasts removed allowed her / him to legally change her / his gender on all government documents even though she / he didn’t have any of her reproductive organs removed. Does this mean that any women who have radical mastectomies can legally change their gender? It sounds like it.

Pumpkin believes that since Thomas is living as a man and believes that he is a man that that makes him a man. Her question to me is “What makes someone a man or a woman?” How can we label the genders?

These are good questions. And I don’t know that there are any real answers because the variations on the theme are so huge. After watching the show I guess that I tend to think of him / her more as a man than a woman but I still say that calling him / her the first Pregnant Man is really stretching it. Biologically I still feel that she / he is a female and so cannot be a Pregnant Man regardless of legal status but I must concede that since she / he has a legal definition as a man that she / he can go down on the books as the first Pregnant Man. Even as I write this it feels wrong! I will concede that she wants to be a he, lives like a he, and acts like a he but deep down I don’t think that he is!

What do you think? How do you stand on this … pregnant man or not?

Have a terrific day!

Ella

PS If you have something hateful to say about him / her please do not comment. I fully respect her / his right to choose her / his gender and live as he / she pleases. I am only splitting hairs on whether I believe that she / he deserves the “Pregnant Man” designation.

PPS I haven't done any actual research about this topic except for thinking about it and watching the television show (called Pregnant Man).

PPPS Follow-up FYI. I looked up a medical definition of the term male and female. Interestingly as it relates to this discussion, the definition for female is "an individual organism of the sex that bears young or produces ova or eggs" and "an individual of the sex that produces ova or bears young" while male is "Of, relating to, or designating the sex that has organs to produce spermatozoa for fertilizing ova" and "A member of the sex that begets young by fertilizing ova".

Surprise Surprise – Who Would Have Guessed?

I want to ask anyone who knows me whether they would consider me an “A” type personality or not? Before I started my "research" for this post I would have guessed that I would get an almost 100% rousing “YES – A for sure!”. But, wait! I’m NOT. No, really, I’m not. I just took some tests and that proves it.

It all started with a conversation today with Megara. Actually, I guess it started last week when Megara said that she never considered herself an “A” type personality (If you knew her you would have laughed too - old dopey me and my ignorance!). I would have bet that she was an “A” type … that is, until I did my own test and found out that I wasn’t an “A” type personality! So, now that I have done 3 of these tests I realize that I am, no joke, a certified TYPE B! Me!! Type B!! Who knew???

Then again, I think that I had a different idea of what an “A” type personality was. I guess that I never imagined that it was soooo extreme. Have I changed? Was I always really a mix or have I evolved that way? I must do more tests.

I would love it if you (yes that means you Megara) would do a few of these tests and let me know what your results are.

Here are some test sites (and my results from these sites):

http://discoveryhealth.queendom.com/type_a_personality_access.html

Results of Your Type A Personality Test

Personality Type
Your score = 41

What does your score mean?
You seem to be in the middle between the Type A and Type B personality. In this case, the middle ground is good. Your attitude to life is more of the "smell the roses" kind and you know how and when to relax. Nonetheless, you realize that picking up a challenge and competing a little bit for your place in the sun can add some spice to your life. The equilibrium is important, so don't let your hostile, aggressive, and competitive alter ego take over too often. Generally, you are easy to be around, and people tend to feel relaxed and comfortable in your presence. Yours is a very healthy attitude towards life.

http://www.queendom.com/tests/access_page/index.htm?idRegTest=1126

Score 35 / 100 (100 = A extreme)
Your interactions with others, while characterized by warmth and tolerance the majority of the time, may occasionally be tinged with impatience and hostility. When you’re stressed or frustrated, you may lash out at others or end up stewing in anger or frustration, but this is very rare. Since you generally trust others, you are usually willing to open up emotionally and value relationships for the sake of the people involved, instead of what they can do for you. This is fortunate because a high amount of this aspect of the Type A Behavior Pattern (TABP) can not only be extremely harmful to relationships, it is also very damaging to your health. While originally it was thought that global TABP was the culprit in coronary heart disease, research now shows that hostility, impatience, and other related traits are the real source of the problem. Based on your results here, you are likely not at a very elevated risk of heart disease, but keep in mind that there are other causes unrelated to the TABP, such as poor diet, lack of exercise, and smoking, among other things.

http://www.psychtests.com/tests/personality/type_a_r_access.html

Results of the Type A Personality Test -R

Your score = 48

What does your score mean?
You seem to have a Type B personality. Your personality draws characteristics from each of the other personality types, that is, Type A and Type C. Either you adjust your behavior depending on the situation, or you tend to be moderated in your attitudes. In any case, you are the most balanced of the three personality types.

Some Information About Type A and Type B Personality

According to scientific literature, Type A behavior is characterized by an intense and sustained drive to achieve goals and an eagerness to compete. Personalities categorized as Type A tend to have a persistent desire for external recognition and advancement. They are involved in various functions that bring about time restrictions. Such personalities have a tendency to speed up mental and physical tasks with extraordinary mental and physical alertness. These characteristics make for super-achievers and high-powered people.
Type A individuals can get a lot done and have the potential to really move ahead in the world. But there is a high price to pay. Certain components of such a personality can inhibit happiness and even threaten health. For example, the goals that Type A folks set are often poorly defined and therefore hard to achieve—a perfect recipe for misery.
Type A is also characterized by a general discontentedness and the impulse to be overly critical and demanding, even contemptuous of imperfection, in the self and others. This focus on negative aspects and the accompanying bursts of hostility and impatience result in guilt, remorse and anxiety.
Type A personalities are motivated by external sources (instead of by inner motivation), such as material reward and appreciation from others. Type A folks experience a constant sense of opposition, wariness, and apprehension--they are always ready for battle. And anyone can imagine how this constant (and very exhausting) existence would deplete reserves of contentment and happiness and disrupt personal equilibrium.
Although the literature is somewhat inconsistent because of problems with the conceptualization and definition of Type A behavior pattern, it has been linked to higher risks of cardiovascular diseases. The risks seemed to be reduced with intervention aimed at reducing Type A behavior. Indeed, those with a high Type A score would be happier and healthier if they were to file down the jagged edges of their personality. By learning how to control the negative behavior patterns while preserving their drive, Type A people can be successful without sacrificing their emotional well-being.
Type B behavior is usually defined as the absence of Type A behavior. Type B personalities are relaxed and have a laid-back attitude and posture. They are friendly, accepting, patient, at ease, and generally content. They are at peace with themselves and others. They show a general sense of harmony with people, events, and life circumstances. They tend to be trusting. They focus on the positive aspects of things, people and events. Type B folks are self-encouraging, have inner motivation, are stable and have a pleasant mood. They are interested in others and accept trivial mistakes. They have an accepting attitude about trivial mistakes and a problem-solving attitude about major mistakes. They are flexible and good team members. The Type B person is able to lead and be led.

Project 365 Photo of the Day

Today I decided to treat myself. I was only going to get an ice cream cone from Baskin & Robbins but then the clerk told me (no word of a lie) that the Chocolate Chip (the only B&R ice cream worth the calories - and it is sooooo worth it) ice cream was too soft. The quart cartons were my only choice (really, I HAD to!). And, they were 1 for $6 and 2 for $9. What would you do? If one of my goals is to be more protective of our money then I just had to get both. You have to agree (don't let me know if you don't). Anyway, here is the evidence (no I didn't eat both quarts already but, admittedly, I do feel a little sick from eating so much).

When Will We Start Taking Responsibility?

Okay I’m a little pissed off now. Who am I kidding? I am A LOT pissed off right now. First there was “ED” yes you know the dreaded “Erectile Dysfunction”, the whole marketing-ploy concept of which just irritates the crap out of me. Those ads that we have to put up with! The slow dancing! Give me a break! Please. But I think that they have gone one better now. Now we have … drum roll please … and I’m not kidding you here this is actually happening … “Metabolic Syndrome”. Yes, you heard it here first (well maybe not here first but I hope so or I will be really worried) … METABOLIC SYNDROME!

Get this “in surveying 5,077 adults, researchers found that those who got little or no daily exercise or ate low calcium diets were at least 1.5 times as likely to develop metabolic syndrome, a cluster of conditions (including high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and excess belly fat) that up your risk for heart disease and diabetes.” Well NO SHIT SHERLOCK!

Honestly, I can barely think when I read this. Talk about something that causes high blood pressure!

Now, eating a crap diet and not doing any exercise isn’t just overeating and laziness it is a “Metabolic Syndrome”. Hey, I don’t have diabetes because I eat Ho-Hos all day long and sit on my ass, it is because I have “Metabolic Syndrome”. Poor pitiful me… I have a syyyynnndrome. Yes, a Syndrome. It isn’t my fault. It is a syyyynnnndrome.

AKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!

I can see it now, all the pharmaceutical ads that promise that we will be slimly slow dancing again in no time. I just want to puke (hey, maybe that is a syndrome too!)

Thank you for allowing me to rant (not that you really had a choice but Thank You anyway).

I hope that you have a syndrome-free day!

Ella

PS. I may post more later. I just had to get this off my chest.

PPS. Why does the guy look so happy in the picture. Doesn't he know he has a Syndrome. Oh, now I get it. That is why he is so happy. It isn't because he is on 15 different types of medication because he has eaten almost his weight in calories every day and can't walk more than 20 steps without feeling faint. It is because he knows now that it wasn't his fault. He has a synnnndrome. Whew! He might have had to feel bad about himself for a minute. Thank goodness that is over!

PPS. I took this photo of the day before I cleaned up my "sick" table. I have found that when you are sick you end up with a junkie table with all the essentials around you. Here are a few of those essentials for me.

Climbing Out of The Abyss

Okay, I think that I am almost back. I am weak as a kitten, I still feel like napping all the time, and I still have a ton of flu symptoms (that word just doesn’t look like it is spelled correctly – what a strange word) but I have only taken the normal dose of cold / flu medications and I actually feel semi-human so I think that I am on the mend. Plus, I have the strength to write this blog post which must mean that I am close to being 100% again.

Have you ever experienced a “fever breaking”? I have seen it happen with my kids but I can’t remember it happening to me before at least not as vividly. A few nights ago I was having just a dreadful night: my body wasn’t regulating its temperature at all; I was freezing most of the time (I had on a sweater over my night tank and bed socks on while huddling under my duvet in a house heated to 74°F); my sinuses felt like they were holding back the Colorado river; my eyes were watering so much I couldn’t see; my neck felt like I had whiplash (all this and I was medicated at almost double the Nyquil Nighttime dose); and overall I felt as bad as bad could be. I knew that I had a fever because my skin was pretty darned hot. I was thrashing around in bed alternating between wild dreams and feeling all sorry for myself and then all of a sudden I woke up and the my fever had “broken”. I wasn’t all sweaty and hot, I didn’t need my sweatshirt, I didn’t “freeze” when I got up to go to the bathroom … well, you get the idea. I could tell that I was a bit better. It was so strange. One minute you are absolutely sick as a dog and the next you are just plain old sick. Weird. Let me know if you have experienced this. I don’t think that I want to be that sick again for a long, long time.

One thing that I really missed was having Prince Charming here ... or actually anyone that would have cared for me (do I sound pathetic enough yet?). When you are really sick you don’t want to have to deal with the real world. You don’t want to have to walk the dogs and make yourself food, or actually do anything. You just want to wallow. Or, at least I do. You also want someone to feed you soup, and bring you tea, and make a fuss over you. You want someone to care. Someone to acknowledge how sick you are. Someone to tsk tsk over how unfair it is that you are sick. Someone to commiserate with you. I do know that I am lucky that I don’t have to go into work, or look after little kids at home, or have any other pressing things that I have to look after except for the dogs.


Speaking of caring ... My mom used to make me something called Egg in a Cup when I was feeling puny. It is basically 2 soft boiled eggs mixed with buttered toast squares (crust taken off) and salt. I don’t think that there is a much better sick-in-bed comfort food than that. The thing is it doesn’t work if you have to make it yourself. It only works if someone brings it to you with a cup of tea … and then it can cure almost anything. Mom’s have the magic touch when it comes to making you feel better no matter how old you are. (I can’t believe that I found a picture of egg in a cup! Someone else must have a great mom too!)

I hope that I have more to report tomorrow than a “how is Ella feeling” update.

Have a terrific flu-free day!

Ella

If Anyone Deserves a Pity Party I Do!

Okay so I have been having a big old pity party for myself. I have the flu for the second time in about a month. Honestly!

I have been sitting on the couch or sleeping all day. And with sitting comes eating. And with pity parties come BIG calorie eating. Akkk! So, I have the flu, am eating a ton, and am burning about zero calories. AKKK!!!

Consequently I have nothing to say except to gripe more and I don’t feel like taking a picture either.

Thanks for all of the good wishes. I hope to be up and around a bit more tomorrow.

Have a healthy day!

Ella

PS And to make myself feel worse about EVERYTHING I think that I have gained 2 lbs this week! I am declaring this "My Life Sucks Day!!!!"