Word Woes

Isn’t it funny how one thing can happen and then another linking and then another all in the same subject realm and you keep getting hit on the head with examples until finally you give in and really, really start to think about a topic. In consequence all day today I have been thinking about the incredible power of words.

A friend of mine told me a story (true) about how an ill-thought, ill-spoken opinion comment made in someone’s hearing (they didn’t know that they were overheard but hadn’t tried to hide their comment) that recently lost that person their dream job a decade after the comment was made (one of the interviewers overheard the comment). The commenter will NEVER know that they lost the job because of that comment. All they know is that they won’t get the job. Hmm …

So let’s think about this for a minute. Think about all of the pronouncement-like, judgmental comments that we have made in our lifetime. How many of these comments have bitten us in the ass but we don’t even know it. It may not be as much of an ass biting as the poor schmuck in our example but then again, it may just. The point is … we won’t even know. Or maybe the point is that words are powerful and so guard the “bad” ones or the “bad” thoughts or the thoughtless ones. I don’t know.

Anyone who knows me knows that I am pretty forthcoming with an opinion if asked, and often if not asked. People are very fond of saying “Tell us how you really feel” after I have just “expressed myself” on a subject. I tell it like I see it. If I start guarding my words am I staying true to myself? If I don’t guard them am I willing to live with the consequences of those words? Is it enough to remember this cautionary tale and bide accordingly (whatever that accordingly means to you)?

If we go back to yesterday’s Golden rule discussion it might be good to bring that rule in the mix and add an addendum “Speak unto or around others as you would have others speak unto and around you”.

Would that have covered our commenter? I don’t know that it would have. The commenter was speaking an opinion, their opinion. They just didn’t realize how offensive their opinion was to the person that overheard it. Could the commenter even realize that their opinion in this instance might be offensive? Well, maybe.

Perhaps if we followed a rule that said “Speak unto others only as you would have those words broadcast to the world”. Yes, I think that this might just cover it. If you couldn’t say it to the world at large perhaps you better either keep those words to yourself or be prepared to live with the consequences of those words.

Note: I am not talking about private, in private, discussions with best friends, spouses, your children, siblings, or anyone else that you trust implicitly. I believe that we all need an outlet for unfettered and uncensored opinions. Although, it is also good to still remember the power of those words.

Here’s hoping that your words bring you nothing but joy,

Ella